NDP/CAW: A CRAZY STUFFED CHRISTMAS SPECIAL REVIEW
Coming back less often than Brock Lesnar on any WWE programming ever, it's time for another edition of Zaiah Meltzers CAW Show Reviews!
On this edition, we are taking a look at the CAW All-Stars and New Dawn Pro joint show: A Crazy Stuffed Christmas Special!
As always, these are my non-kayfaybe opinions and probably shouldn't me taken too seriously. With that said, ON TO THE REVIEW!
CAS PRESENTS A CRAZY STUFFED CHRISTMAS SPECIAL STAR RATINGS:
Gorilla Warfare vs Kane Klux Klan…. 
- ***1/2 (In all my life watching virtual wrestling, I have never been so dumbfounded as I was watching this match. And, in a weird sense, I think that’s why I like this match so much. It is so incredibly stupid that it’s entertaining, so I guess it wins on those grounds. So Gorilla Warfare is a stable consisted of entirely Harambe’s like Iron Harambe, You Can’t See Harambe, Harambedust, & the actual Harambe… I have never wanted to die as much as I did the very moment I saw this team. And to make matters worse, we had the Kane Klux Klan consisted of Kane, Kane-adian Ba-Kane, Candy Kane, & Breast Cancer Awareness Kane… I just… I don’t know… Anyway, I’m not going to bother with going over storytelling and psychology, because there was none. Absolutely zero. However, I will say that the action was all over the place and chaotic, which is how all multi man matches should be in my opinion. The Original Harambe also had a killer performance near the end of the match, so that was cool to see. If you’re looking for a match with complex character work and legitimate good wrestling, then you are in the wrong place. But, if you like non wholesome fun, then you are going to love this match.
- ***1/2 (In all my life watching virtual wrestling, I have never been so dumbfounded as I was watching this match. And, in a weird sense, I think that’s why I like this match so much. It is so incredibly stupid that it’s entertaining, so I guess it wins on those grounds. So Gorilla Warfare is a stable consisted of entirely Harambe’s like Iron Harambe, You Can’t See Harambe, Harambedust, & the actual Harambe… I have never wanted to die as much as I did the very moment I saw this team. And to make matters worse, we had the Kane Klux Klan consisted of Kane, Kane-adian Ba-Kane, Candy Kane, & Breast Cancer Awareness Kane… I just… I don’t know… Anyway, I’m not going to bother with going over storytelling and psychology, because there was none. Absolutely zero. However, I will say that the action was all over the place and chaotic, which is how all multi man matches should be in my opinion. The Original Harambe also had a killer performance near the end of the match, so that was cool to see. If you’re looking for a match with complex character work and legitimate good wrestling, then you are in the wrong place. But, if you like non wholesome fun, then you are going to love this match.
Brockmas vs Santa Claus vs Scott Steiner vs Adolf Hitler vs Chyna vs Dusty Rhodes - Elimination Chamber Match - **** (Wow. I didn’t know a match filled with so many dick punches could be this good, but here we are. So this is the first ever inter gender elimination chamber match in this history of… wrestling and it only features one woman, that being Chyna. So, this was as chaotic as the last match on the card, but this one seemed to have more structure than the last match. Chyna proved to be a force to be reckoned with as she continuously dick punched her way to a victory and dear lord was it glorious to see. Every one got time to shine though. Brock F-5ed Steiner on the steel and Steiner screwdriverd Brock on the steel, so that was nice to see. Santa punched Dusty Rhodes in the face and Adolf Hitler was… there. So yeah, good shit.
Crazy Stuff Rumble - *** (I… I don’t know what… I have no words. There was the kool aid man, water, V-Pac, there was even a god damn German Shepard at one point. I saw Squidward, The Pepsiman, a bunch of block wrestlers, and I swear to god some of the luchadors were just original CAW’s wearing masks. The names were all over the place and it was quite interesting to see. As for the match itself, it was pretty much 2 standard rumbles mashed into one. Not very much to it (mostly because the 2K devs refuse to fix their shitty rumble matches). Not much in pure action or storytelling so these notes are going to stay pretty short. If you like long royal rumble matches, then I guess you’ll like this.
Donald Trump vs Brandon Wolfe - CAW All-Stars Championship - ***1/4 (This was far more entertaining than it had any right to be. Just the fact that Donald was presented as this juggernaut that Brandon couldn’t knock down at the beginning of this match was already a bit concerning, but then Donald actually started to get some offense in and even I got a bit scared. However, Brandon would eventually fight his way back and put this man in the ground where he belongs. This thing went for about 5 to 6 minutes, but god damn, if those minutes weren’t entertaining as all hell. Brandon actually got to feel like a legitimate babyface in the first time in forever and Trump got to play the worlds greatest heel we all knew he could be. A highly recommended title match.
OVERALL SCORE: 7.25/10 (There are plenty of problems with this show. The audio is out of sync, the quality isn’t all that great, and the music sometimes overpowers everything in the video. However, with that said, this show mainly shines thanks to the funny commentary, some entertaining matches, and over the top moments. It’s a show that doesn’t take itself too seriously and knowns when to have fun. It may not be perfect, but it sure as hell is unique.)
I am going to try my hardest to get more reviews out this coming considering I still have Wicked Worlds, Fandemonium, and other show's left to go. However, if you have a show you want me to review next, make sure you leave a suggestion in the comment section below.
THANKS FOR READING!
Comments
Post a Comment